Remembering Mother on her 10th Death Anniversary

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Dearest Maa, 

If I could turn back the clock, I would. And I know that is not the way life works. Even after 10 Years, you are still everywhere

I know you would not want me sad. But I can’t stop thinking about my longing for your presence.

You left us today and it's already been a decade. Though my actual memories of the days and weeks that led up to your death have almost faded, my feelings of sorrow are bone-deep. I don’t need to remember with any amount of clarity to feel overwhelmingly sad.

As the years roll by, my feelings of loss change shape and I’ve noticed that they’re fixated on the passage of time lately. I’ve found that the more time I place between you and me, the more acutely I ache for the past.

Ten years after your death, I understand that the vulnerability to experience grief is always with me. Some days, it lies dormant. Some days, it becomes inflamed like emotional rheumatism. Like a particular time of year, certain experiences flip a switch, and I am flooded with feelings of grief, nostalgia, yearning, and whatever else bubbles up to the surface.

I still remember you explaining to us shortly before you left us. ‘If you can remember me, I will be with you always.” Yes, Maa you're here, with Me & Neetu.

With lots of Love, Hugs, and Kisses

P.S ~ To the reader: There is no death, People die only when we forget them, remember to keep them in your thoughts and prayers.




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